| When we think of soul mates, many of us
think of a loving couple whose every thought, word and hope is
realised by the presence of the other partner. Some go further,
imagining that meeting their soul mate might be the end of a search
for deep love and understanding.
When researching Finding Your Soul Mate, a different
picture emerged. Although couples who responded to my questionnaire
spoke of a deep love and an instinctual 'knowing' that they were
meant to be together, they also described the difficulties of being
in or beginning a soul mate love relationship.
Equal to the mountain peaks are the valleys it seems, and many
soul mates love relationships had deep and often painful issues
which demanded attention. The difference however, with soul mate
partners is often the level of commitment to the possibilities these
relationships possess. In some cases even when partners ran away
from the possibilities of such a powerful love, they found
themselves back together again. In some cases each partner married
someone else and pursued separate lives before rediscovering one
another.
Seeing soul mates as people who have spent time together (as
partners, family members of as friends) in previous lives, it stands
to reason that some deep part of them is aware of each other when
they meet in this life. This awareness often surfaces as feelings
and sometimes these feelings can be misinterpreted.
 Sometimes you may be completely unaware when a soul mate
arrives, as I was in 1983 when sharing a small terrace house in
Sydney's eastern suburbs. When our fourth co-tenant left for a job
interstate, we advertised for a replacement. After interviewing more
than 15 people we were no closer to finding a suitable person, when
Jenny arrived to look at the room. My two co-tenants liked her
immediately but I felt that she was unhealthy and unhappy with her
life, and I didn't want to live with her.
"Well, since we both like Jenny and you don't, if you really
don't want her to live here I suggest that you pay the rent on the
fourth room until we find someone suitable," suggested Dominic.
Knowing that I couldn't afford to pay for an extra room, I accepted
Jenny and soon we became firm friends.
Six months later we moved out together to a house of our own and
had the time of our lives. We grew closer and closer until I noticed
that I could begin a sentence and Jenny would finish it. I'd make a
humorous comment about a situation and she’d take it to extremes. We
shared two more houses together as we found one another easy
company. Jenny died in the late 1980's, and several months after her
death I delved into our history together. Through hypnosis I was
regressed into a life we had shared together at the turn of the
century in England, where we had both been men. There we cemented a
friendship which was to last lifetimes.
Soul mates as friends, family members and as your children makes
sense when you consider that soul mates are mastering spiritual
lessons together. Discovering the underlying spiritual lessons
together can take some of the tension out of the relationship and at
times such knowledge can explain current behaviour.
An example of this occurred with Carl, whose unshakeable belief
that his partner Rachael would disappear one day without warning and
without trace was undermining their long term relationship. Through
a series of hypnosis regressions it became obvious that Rachael had
been in relationship with Carl previously (in previous lives) and
that things had ended badly three times. In one life their
relationship ended when Rachael (then also a woman) was caught
having an affair.
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These past life memories were affecting Carl's present
relationship, reducing his trust of Rachael. When they had met
this lifetime Carl avoided Rachael for the first four months
and she pursued him determinedly. It is possible that Carl's
deeper memories reminded him of previous pain with
Rachael.
Soul mate friendships, relationships and business
partnerships offer us deep spiritual lessons if we are
prepared to embrace them. When you consider how many times you
may have lived, there are opportunities for many soul mate
friendships and relationships. While seeking your one soul
mate, perhaps you are overlooking all the others, and lets
face it, you can't have too many friends.
This is taken from Paul's book Finding Your Soul
Mate.
(2009 Academy
Publishing.) |
Soul © Copyright 2003
Paul Fenton-Smith | 
